This Is How We Mountain Dew It (Dick's Poem)/Transcript
The following is a transcript from the 220th episode of The Geo Team, This Is How We Mountain Dew It (Dick's Poem). Act 1 (Intro) (Shows the title card with Crash being surrounded by Mountain Dew vending machines) ("This Is How We Do It" by Montell Jordan music plays) Text: Written by PATRIC M. VERRONE and GEO G. Text: Storyboard by GEO G. Text: Directed by CHUCK SHEETZ (Fades to black) (Fades to Toon Link's castle at Hyrule) (Cuts to Crash watching Toon Link playing Wind Waker on his Nintendo GameCube) Toon Link: I've played this game over 10 times! Crash: Cool and impressive! (confused) But don't you get bored playing it over 10 times? Toon Link: No, not really. (Toon Link pauses the game, and goes to get Mountain Dew) (He comes back) Toon Link: Want some Mountain Dew? It's in the kitchen if you want it! Crash: Yes. I've never drank Mountain Dew. (Clock wipe occurs, and Crash is seen drinking Mountain Dew) Crash: (takes a sip of Mountain Dew) Ahh, I love the taste of Mountain Dew. Toon Link: I've always liked it. Crash: Can I come back next time to play Crash of the Titans? Toon Link: Yes. (Cuts to Dick Grayson writing a poem at Green Bob's house) Dick: Roses are red, violets are blue, I need to drink some Mountain Dew, when I go to the bathroom? (scrunches up paper) GRRRRR... This poem sucks, along with Mountain Dew. Green Bob: Dick, why do you hate Mountain Dew? Dick: It was a random rhyme. I don't actually hate the Mountain Dew drinks, but Homer does. Homer: (off-screen) I heard that! Green Bob: What's the problem, then? Dick: All of the poems I've written tonight are horrible. The entry deadline for the Geoville Poem Night is in a week. There's no way I'm going to win it. Green Bob: If you believe in yourself, you can win. Dick: If that is easy for you to say, you don't have to worry. You are friends with one of the most famous people in Geoville. Green Bob: (jealous) That's easy for you to say. (Geo Guy arrives as he talks to Green Bob) Geo Guy: Green Bob, Crash left to go to the Geo Market to buy some Mountain Dew. Green Bob: Really? Geo Guy: Yes. (Green Bob stayed silent in 3 seconds) Green Bob: (talks to Dick) Okay, so what we gonna do? Dick: I don't know, what you wanna do? Green Bob: I don't know, what we gonna do? Geo Guy: (angry) Look, Green Bob, first you say, "What we gonna do?" Then Dick says, "I don't know, what you wanna do?" Then you say, "What we gonna do?" Dick says, "What you wanna do?" "What we gonna do?" "What you wanna do?" "What we gonna do?" "What you want..." Let's do SOMETHING! Green Bob: Okay. What you wanna do? Geo Guy: Gee golly! There you go again. The same notes again! Like I said before, let's do SOMETHING! Okay? Green Bob: Okay. Geo Guy: Good. Act 2 (Fades to Crash Bandicoot arriving at the Geo Market by bus) Crash: This is my chance to buy.... (Mountain Dew cans appear on his eyes) Mountain Dew. This is how I Mountain Dew it. (This Is How We Do It music plays) (Crash goes inside the Geo Market, and tries to find Mountain Dew) (He goes into the frozen food aisle) Crash: Yum, chicken. (He goes to the drink aisle) Crash: (searching for Mountain Dew) WHERE IS MOUNTAIN DEW? (goes to shop worker) Where is Mountain Dew, sir? Shop worker: Mountain Dew is right at the end. (points at Mountain Dew) Over there. Crash: Thank you, sir. Shop worker: You're welcome. (Crash gets Mountain Dew, and goes to the cashier) Crash: Here are my frozen chicken and Mountain Dew. (As soon the cashier has checked all of Crash's orders, Crash goes rushing out) (This Is How We Do It music ends) Act 3 (Unknown to Crash, Gree Guy has been in the drink aisle) Gree Guy: MWHAHAHA! (calls the Gree Team) Hey, Gree Team. Crash likes Mountain Dew!! Memy9909: (on the phone) That's great! What evil plan should we do? Gree Guy: (on the phone) Well, we can add a dangerous chemical into all of the Mountain Dew drinks! (nervous) By the way, the dangerous chemical from Planet Gree was called Dumbinium oxide. (scheming) But still, we will add it to the Mountain Dew drinks! (They both laugh with evil laughter, but Gree Guy gets kicked out of Geo Market and the shop worker went outside of Geo Market) Shop worker: (angry) Get the hell out of the store, Gree Guy, you evil criminal villain! And stay out! Only good people are allowed in the store, not bad people. (confused) What am I? (jealous) A clown? (furious) GET AWAY FROM THE STORE NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!!! (The shop worker went back inside the Geo Market, and Gree Guy felt ashamed as he started to cry) Gree Guy: (crying) WHHHHHHHHHHHHHY!?! (Cuts to Crash walking on the street) Dick Grayson: Hello, Crash. (Crash stops walking) Crash: Hi. Dick Grayson: (pointing at the Mountain Dew sticking out in the shopping bag) Isn't that Mountain Dew? I didn't know you liked it. Crash: Yes. Dick Grayson: I was talking to Green Bob about Mountain Dew last night. Crash: Okay... (Cuts to The Gree Team arriving by taxi outside the Pepsico building in New York City) (The Gree Team get out of the taxi) Gree Guy: (looks at the building's logo) It's the company that made Mountain Dew. Memy9909: Yes. Gree Guy: About the taxi? Where did you get it from? Memy9909: Well... (whispers) I stole it from a taxi driver from Newark in New Jersey. Gree Guy: What? (Pingux2012 gets out of the taxi trunk and The Gree Team go inside the Board of Directors room) (Cuts to The Gree Team arriving on the floor with the CEO showing a chart) Pepsico CEO: The sales of Mountain Dew have increased by 8% in United States and Canada. But the sales of Pep-- Gree Guy: Ahem... (shows a box of Dumbinium oxide) (Fades to black for commercial break) Act 4 (Fades to The Gree Team and the Pepsico businessmen in the Pepsico Board of Directors room) Pepsico CEO: Well, well, well. (points at the box) What's that. Gree Guy: It's a box of Dumbinium oxide. Pepsico CEO: Dumbinium what-is-the-name? Gree Guy: Like I said, it's Dumbinium oxide. But yes, I want to add it. (The Pepsico businessmen started to get it) Gree Guy: It's a very (sneer) dangerous c-- (The Pepsico staff gasped) Gree Guy: (sneering) I mean safe. (pretends to be happy) It's a very safe chemical that will make the person obese... (The Pepsico staff gasped again) Gree Guy: (sneering) I mean... make the person be stupid.... Pepsico CEO: So that's why it's called Dumbinium oxide. Gree Guy: And make the person lose their memory. (The Pepsico staff gasped) Pepsico Businessman: (jealous) Worst... Idea... (angry) EVER! Pepsico CEO: (angry) Well sir, since our staff disagrees with your idea, the Dumbinium oxide idea of yours, has... been... REJECTED! Gree Guy: (angry) GRRRRR! I'll spray you with my hypnotize spray (gets his hypnotize spray out) (Pepsico staff get sprayed) Pepsico staff: (hypnotized) We will accept your idea. Pepsico CEO: (phones the Mountain Dew factory workers) We'll supply the chemical Dumbinium oxide in Mountain Dew. Pepsico staff (with The Gree Team): MWHAHAHAHA! Pepsico CEO: What else should we do, Gree Guy? Disguise the Dumbinium oxide on the Mountain Dew label? Gree Guy: We should disguise the Dumbinium oxide. (Cuts to footage of Mountain Dew factory workers adding Dumbinium oxide) Pepisco CEO: (off-screen) MWHAHAHA! (1 week later) (Crash is seen getting a can of Mountain Dew) Crash: Ahhh, Mountain Dew! I wonder what's on the TV. (Crash turns on the television to a parody of Maury) Michael Dovich (on the TV): Methane, you are not the FARTER! Methane (on the TV): (dancing) Yes! I am! Crash: Like eww, was Methane a farter? I don't think she is, but lame. (Crash switches the channel to Channel 7) Station announcer (on the TV): This is Channel 7 News! Crash: The news... (drinks Mountain Dew and gets fatter) Oh no! I'm becoming fat. News reporter #1 (on the TV): There has been cases of Mountain Dew causing obesity in 6 days in the United States. Crash: Yeah, right! (throws finished can at the TV) (Cuts to Geo Guy and Green Bob watching the same news at Geo Guy's house) (Green Bob and Geo Guy gasped) (The scene goes back to Crash) Crash: (finishes another can) Let's call Geo... (loses his memory) Geo Whateverhisnameis? (Crash tries to get the blue remote from Charge Button) Crash: (restores his memory) Oh yeah, let's call George Conner on the phone. (phones Geo Guy) Hello, George Conner. This is Geo Team Residence, Crash Bandicoot speaking. (The screen splits in half; the first screen shows Crash, the second screen shows Geo Guy) Geo Guy: (on the phone, angry) How did you know my real name? Crash: (on the phone) I checked on the Wikia page on my computer, and it says George "Geo Guy" GoGo Conner. Geo Guy: (on the phone, jealous) Oh, you meant my full name? Was my name George "Geo Guy" GoGo Conner? Crash: (on the phone, serious) Yes. Geo Guy: (on the phone) Anyways, what happened to you? Crash: (on the phone) I drank too much Mountain Dew, and look at me. (shouts) I'm fat! Geo Guy: (on the phone) Wait, what? Crash: (on the phone) Yes, i've been fat. But there's also a glitch that keeps mess-- (loses his memory) Mess what? (restores his memory) Messing up my memory! Geo Guy: (on the phone) Oh my god, i'll come over to the Geo Team base. I'll be right there! (hangs up his phone) (Cuts to The Geo Team House) (Cuts to Geo Guy and Crash on the couch) Geo Guy: So what happened? Crash: Like I said before, I drank too much Mountain Dew, I am fat with the Dumbinium oxide, and the Mountain Dew caused obesity in 6 days in the United States. But there's also a glitch that keeps messing up my memory! Geo Guy: (confused) Your memory? Crash: Yes! My memory! Geo Guy: Oh! But wait, if Mountain Dew has Dumbinium oxide, then it must be... (angry) Gree Guy! He's the one that puts Dumbinium oxide into the Mountain Dew, and now the drinks had been cause obesity in 6 days in the United States. Crash: I'm strating to have a glitch in my memory now! (loses his memory) And what are you? A white person with legs shaped like the ones from Battle for Dream Island? (Geo Guy slapped Crash in the face) Geo Guy: (angry) Don't call me BFDI Legs! But no, i'm not. (Green Bob comes into the computer room) Green Bob: Hey, guys. Why does Crash lo-- Geo Guy: He drank Mountain Dew. Green Bob: I know Mountain Dew isn't healthy, but is the drink that bad? Geo Guy: Recently, a chemical, which can be known in both Planet Gree and Planet Earth as Dumbinium oxide, has been added to all Mountain Dew drinks. Green Bob: Okay. (Geo Guy researches the chemical on the Internet) Geo Guy: (reading the page) Dumbinium oxide is a chemical originating from Planet Gree.... Crash: That Gree Guy! (loses his intelligence) There's no way! Mountain Dew is innocent! (restores his intelligence and his memory) Are you crazy!?! Mountain Dew was not innocent!?! (Dick Grayson comes in) Dick Grayson: Hi, guys. Crash: (loses his memory) Who's this twerp? I've never seen him in my life! (Geo Guy slaps Crash Bandicoot) Crash: Owww! (talks to Dick) Sorry, Dick. I've been drinking Mountain Dew that's making me weird. Dick: Okay. So why do you look different? Crash: It's a long story. (stays silent in 3 seconds) So what we gonna do? Dick: (confused) I don't know-- (angry) and now don't start that again! Act 5 (Fades to where Dick, Crash, Geo Guy and Green Bob have buckets full of water) Geo Guy: Got buckets of water ready? (Geo Guy looks at Dick, Crash and Green Bob) Geo Guy: Got your extraordinary remote, Crash? Crash: Yes. Geo Guy: We're ready to go. (talks to Crash) Press the charge button! (They get teleported to the outside of the Pepsico building) Crash: It's New York City! (Cuts to them running into the Board of Directors room) Pepsico CEO: Who are you and where did you come from? Geo Guy: It's not important because we'll throw water at you! (Dick, Geo Guy, Green Bob and Crash throw water at them) Pepsico Businessman #1: No! Not my iPhone! Pepsico Businessman #2: What happened? Pepsico CEO: I don't know what just happened to us for the past 7 days but we've been hypnotized by a blue and purple thing. (looks at the chart) Dumbinium oxide added to Mountain DEW? That's unsafe! (rips the Dumbinium oxide paper and calls every Mountain Dew factory worker) We're removing Dumbinium oxide! (The 4 Geo Team members cheered) Geo Guy: (whispering to Crash) We must find the Gree Team and stop them! Crash: (talking to the 3 Geo Team) We must go back to Geoville to see what has happened! Blue Remote: (grew his face) Press the charge button on me! (points at the charge button) (Crash pressed the charge button as Geo Guy, Green Bob, Dick, and Crash are vanished into fairy dust) (Cuts to Dick on the outer space background) Dick: I need to make my poem entry for the Geoville Poem Night by tomorrow morning. (They got teleported back to Geoville outside the Geo Market when Crash pressed the charge button on his remote) Crash: (looking through the automatic doors) The bad guys removed everything from the store except Mountain Dew. Geo Guy: And Memy's a cashier! (They gasped and go inside, but Green Bob gets squashed between the automatic doors) Green Bob: (squashed) A little help here... (The 3 Geo Team members help him get unsquashed) Green Bob: Thank you. (walks away) Geo Guy: (looking at all the Mountain Dew balloons and merchandise) Too much Mountain Dew, don't you think? Crash Bandicoot: Yeah. (looks at what used to be the drink aisle) Wait, a second... Both (Geo Guy and Crash): (Crash points at Gree Guy) Isn't that Gree Guy? (they run into the aisle) Gree Guy: (talking to Bryan Guy) Yes, we did overthrow the Geo Market boss. (turns around to see Crash and Geo Guy) Well, well. What have we here? Crash: You've got The Geo Team... well, the four of us... (Green Bob and Dick come to the aisle) Green Bob: Too bad I can't have Mountain Dew without having bad side-effects until tomorrow. Gree Guy: Well, you idiots got me fired, eh? Well, THAT'S IT! (calls the Gree Team) Come to this aisle! (The rest of the Gree Team arrive in the aisle) Gree Guy: Let's do this. (Motto starts) Gree Guy: We're The Gree Team. Pingux2012: We make the best crime schemes. CookieEater2: We're going to destroy The Geo Team. Memy9909: And gonna ground them all! Gree Guy: Gree Guy! Pingux2012: Pingux! CookieEater: Cookie Eater! Memy: Memy. Bryan Guy, Keithy Guy, Elias, Warren and Sack99Swell: And Bryan Guy, Keithy Guy, Elias, Warren and Sack99Swell! (Motto ends) Gree Guy: Well, let's battle! (press the big red button on his remote; the only button) (The 3 aisles turned into Mountain Dew robots; they have a vending machine as their body, straws as their legs and arms, and Mountain Dew cans as their feet, hands, and eyes) Mountain Dew robot #1: Exterminate! Exterminate! Crash: ROBOTS? Green Bob: That's a rip-off of Daleks from Doctor Who! (The robot attacks Green Bob by shaking his right hand can and shooting out Mountain Dew liquid) Green Bob: What the? Crash: (angry) GRRRRR! (runs and double jumps on the robot) (Mountain Dew robot #1 slips on his own liquid, and crashes into the other 2 robots and the rest of the Gree Team except Gree Guy) Memy9909: (hurt) OWWWWWW!!!! The Geo Team will be grounded! (The robots explode) Gree Guy: I'm calling the cop-- (Crash punched Gree Guy in the face) Crash: Sorry sir, you won't. Now I have to get my Dumbinium oxide-free Mountain Gru... I mean, Mountain Dew cannon. Gree Guy: You don't have one. Crash: Yes, I do... (takes his blue remote out of his pocket) ...with the power of my charge button! (presses the charge button on his remote) (A Mountain Dew cannon appears... along with Gru, Stuart, Kevin, Bob, and Dave) Crash: Oh no! I've accidentally said Gru. Gree Guy: What an idiot! Dave: (speaking Minionese, angry) Domo cora lom nan idiot! Bob: (speaking English, angry) Dave says, "Don't call him an idiot!", because he means it! Gru: (holding a PX-49 potion) Gru's back in the game. Dick Grayson: (looks at the potion) I recognize that. (Clock wipe occurs) Crash: We've added PX-49 to the Mountain Dew cans in this cannon. Geo Guy: And we are going to stop you! Gree Guy: This is boring. (Crash lights the cannon and a can comes shooting out) Bryan Guy: (starting to standing up) Ow! What happ-- (The can hits Bryan Guy and it lands on the store floor) Bryan Guy: (looking at the can) Holy crap! (shocked) It's a Mountain Dew Ba- bomb! (Zooms to the Mountain Dew can and pauses for 2 seconds) (Fades to black) Act 6 (Fades to the timer on the Mountain Dew can) Mountain Dew Bomb Timer: This can will self-destruct in 3, 2, 1! (The Mountain Dew bomb exploded as The Gree Team are sent flying through the roof of the Geo Market) The Gree Team: The Gree Team are blasting off! Memy9909: (scared) Again! Bryan Guy: That's a rip-off of Pokémon! Gree Guy: Shut up, Bryan! (lands outside a prison on Planet Gree; turns around) Uh-oh! Bryan Guy: It's a good thing that I'm not recognized on this planet. (A Greeian police officer goes to the Gree Team and talks) Greeian Police Officer: Hey you, Gree Team! You're all under arrest for hypnotizing the Pepsico staff at the Pepsico building in New York City, adding Dumbinium oxide into all of the Mountain Dew cans, and turning Geo Market into a Mountain Dew store! (handcuffs all of them) Gree Guy: (David's voice) Awww, seriously? Greeian Police Officer: Yes. That's what you get for committing crimes on Earth. Gree Guy: NOOOOOOOO! (Cuts to the Geo Market) Crash: I had no idea that Mountain Dew can explode when mixed with PX-49. Gru: Neither did I. Dave: (speaking English) Wow! Great experiment. Geo Guy: Now that we've defeated Gree Guy for the billionth time, can we just go home? (The robots stand up) Mountain Dew robot #1 and #2: Not on our watch! Geo Guy: Ah! Mountain Dew robot #1: We apologize for attacking you. Mountain Dew robot #3: We were forced to attack you because Gree Guy created us. Dick: Apology accepted. (angry) Now don't do any bad stuff ever again! Okay? Mountain Dew robots: Okay. Dick: Good. Green Bob: So, Dick, after we've defeated Gree Guy for the billionth time, there's something that I need to say to you. Dick: Okay. Go on. Green Bob: So what we gonna do? Dick: (confused) I don't know-- (angry) and now don't start that again! (Fades to the Geo Team, Geo Guy's family and the Mountain Dew robots watching the Geoville Poem Night the next day) Dick Grayson: Roses are red, violets are blue, we saved the world, by stopping Dumbinium oxide, a bad chemical in Mountain Dew! If you drank the Dumbinium oxide version of Mountain Dew, what will you do with it? You'll get fat when you drank too much, and you will go to the bathroom. The end. (Fades to the host announcing the winners) Host: In third place is... (Drumroll) Host: Alsen Nosyit! (gives trophy to Alsen) (Audience clap) Alsen: Third place? (leaves the stage) Host: In second place is... (Drumroll) Host: Timothy Jed, cousin of Daniel Jed. (gives trophy to Timothy) (Audience clap) Daniel Jed: Okay... (leaves the stage) Host: In first place is... (Drumroll) Host: Richard John Grayson! (gives trophy to Dick Grayson) (Audience clap) Dick Grayson: Thank you very much! (leaves the stage) (Pans to The Geo Team and Geo Guy's family sit down in the same row of chairs) (Dick Grayson walks and sits down with them) Crash: Way to go, Dick. Green Bob: You wouldn't have done it without my help. Geo Guy: Green Bob's right. Toon Link: So hey, why didn't we get an appearance in this episode? Dick: Thank you. (talks to Toon Link) Well, because of the making of this episode, the writers chose characters who would be relevant to the plot. Toon Link: Darn it. Dick: (looks at the camera) And that's all folks! (Iris wipe occurs on Dick's face and he winks) (Iris wipe shrinks and disappears) (Crash pops up in a black background) Crash: (smiles and looks at camera) By the way, it was my episode too! (runs off-screen) Text: THE END (Fades to black) (Credits) Category:Transcripts Category:Complete Transcripts